TURNED 24 - Quarter life crisis around!

Gaby Guzman
10 nov 2015
3 Min. de lectura

A few days ago I turned 24 (NOV.5), for some a lot, for others not so much... And I do not know why the sudden panic (Probably because of the famous fear for the quarter life crisis).

On the day of my birthday I had a feeling of anguish and anxiety ever since I got up. Incidentally, I did not sleep well. I went to bed really late.

And as midnight approached (12 o'clock), I thought for hours and hours in everything that has been of my life since I have use of reason, until today (or until that day).

I was thinking how fast life goes by, and how time flies when you least realize it; Some years ago (although not many nor few but some), i was jumping from side to side full of happiness, without worries, insecurities, fears and any kind of responsibility, I was a girl! A happy, joyful and grateful girl with my parents and the people around me!

Today, (again) I lie down in my bed, and I can’t stop thinking about myself 2 years ago, an ignorant of things and life, worrying and thinking that the most important thing was to see what shoes I needed to wear, What bag I had to have, what clothes were on trend, and where I had to be because I couldn’t miss a FRIDAY or SATURDAY night, at the best restaurant, the best club, the best party, etc. I keep looking back and cant stop thinking of how much disappointed I am of myself, when I thought it was all shopping and luxuries .... Is that all I did? ... Was that the only thing that mattered to me? ... I was really so materialistic? or did I just let myself wrap around of what society admires and considers as a success that you forget to be me, my true self, the REAL GABY? .... And I wonder, HOW? How is that those ones closest to me, managed to see through all of that and NEVER judge me? Maybe they managed to see what is inside me, because they love me, and because they know the love I can give and the person I am. And as much as I wish I had been different before, I was not for those people. I did not fail to be ME with them, I failed to myself, and today I changed that.

Call me Sentimental!

As I write this words, I have my baby by my side under my arm, sleeping his nap and I can’t stop thinking about how grateful I am with life and with God, for giving me more life and love, for this great gift! Because despite all the above things, he showed me and taught me that you can be happy in different ways, that love is not only one, it can multiply, you can love several people at the same time and especially oneself.

That is why today I promised myself, that I will be the very best of me that I can be and I will give my best as many times as necessary.

In this life we will be tricked, judge or misjudged, criticized, pointed for not being originals, among many other things, but that is part of belonging to a world we share with others. And I'm okay with that (although I do not agree whit it). My only approach and the only important thing for me is that my near circle is safe and sound; That my family is well and taken care of, that the person next to me will know that he has a partner who will always be there and of whom he will be proud of, and that my daughter will have a mother who is capable of giving her life for her.

Today I want to thank all the people who have always been by my side: My family, my parents, my sisters and brother, my uncles, cousins, grandparents, and my real friends. Because they have always been a great support to me, and have been when I needed them the most, in good ones and bad ones.

Seriously Thank You!!My life without you would be different. Thank you for making my birthday (like every year) the best day of the year. Los Amo!!